You’ve Probably noticed that I haven’t been around as much. Usually I have a post go up every day but there have been several days mixed in without any content. And when I do have something for you it’s been a guest post or short original content.
There’s a reason for that.
In case you didn’t know, in August of 2017 my son, Elliott, was born with congenital heart defects. He had his first heart surgery when he was four days old and he spent the first month of his life in the cardiovascular intensive care unit (CVICU) and neonatal intensive care unit (NICU).
Last year, at the end of February 2018, he had his second heart surgery. It didn’t go well and complications led to him ending up on ECMO (a form of life support) for a month. Four more heart surgeries and numerous heart catheterizations later he was able to go home. He honestly shouldn’t have survived – it’s an absolute miracle that he did.
We knew his next surgery was getting closer but we were hoping to push any other cardiac things off until Spring of 2020 when respiratory season had time to come and go. Elliott has always wanted to do things his own way though.
Two weeks ago he was admitted for a stomach bleed, dehydration, and increased oxygen needs. Thankfully I drove him the two hours to the hospital his heart team is at instead of going to our local children’s emergency room because now he’s having heart issues. It’s been a long two weeks of not being able to figure out what exactly is going on but we seem to be getting closer to having some answers.
He doesn’t look very sick – but he is.
It’s incredibly likely that Elliott will need another heart cath or possibly surgery must sooner than we originally anticipated. At any rate we definitely won’t be heading home any time soon.
Living in the hospital means little sleep, not being able to shower when I feel like it, struggling to find time to eat, constant anxiety and fear, depression, loneliness, anger, and stress.
Every time he’s in the hospital it means I’m here too – which causes me to have to put every day life things on hold. I brought my laptop, Kindle, and some physical review books with me but it’s hard to find the time and energy to work. A few people have been incredibly gracious and offered to do some guest posts for me which I’m so very grateful for.
I know that my focus needs to be on Elliott right now but I’m having a hard time setting my blog aside. It’s something I’ve been working very hard on since creating it in March and it’s been steadily growing every month. I’m not ready to take a hiatus and jeopardize that.
Right now I’m just trying to do the best I can and not stress too much. Please be patient with me if a day or two (or maybe even three or four) goes by without any new content or if it takes me time to respond to comments. I’m working on giving myself some grace and I hope you’ll do the same.
If you want to know more about Elliott and have a better idea on what is going on you can visit his Facebook page.
If you’re interested in writing a guest post please let me know by using my contact form!